WILD SOUL HEALING TAROT CHALLENGE::: DAY 1

Hello one and all and Happy New Moon!!
I got to San Diego on Friday and have spent the past few days relaxing and adjusting. This New Moon has been a bit more subtle than others, the energy hasn’t been as sharp as it’s been in the past. Instead I’ve been faced with vivid dreams and a short temper. I’ve been slacking on my soul work so I was super excited to see that Linsday Mack of Wild Soul Healing put out a tarot challenge! A new month means new habits and a daily tarot practice led by one of my favorite healers seemed like the perfect place to start. I decided it would be something interesting (read::: scary// difficult// emotional // worthy) to share on here. I know that whenever I go through major shifts I’m not alone- we’re all way more connected than we think, so I like to share my own story when possible- so here you go!

:::DAY 1::: WHAT SEED AM I PLANTING THIS NEW MOON
THE WHEEL OF FORTUNE

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Sometimes I doubt the cards and then BAM- they hit me like a pile of bricks (or like a boy who suddenly tells me he’s sold his soul to Satan which is just as scary.) This New Moon I am planting destiny. I am planting my future and sowing the seeds to (hopefully) things larger than I can comprehend.  I start my dream internship with Vivienne Westwood next week and if you’ve talked to me about it, you know two things- 1. I’m freaking out 2. This feels like fate. I’m a fairly decisive person- I’ve always known what I’ve liked and what I’ve wanted and I knew that I needed to work with Vivienne. I know that what’s happening in my immediate future is big. It’s huge. It’s absolute, no chill, hard work paying off, manifestation station, soul pumping fate. It is destiny. It is The Wheel of Fortune in it’s entirety. This internship was the cumulation of a million emails, literally negative chill and an absolute belief that this is what I’m meant to do and where I’m meant to be. And you know what- that’s exactly what this card is.

The Wheel of Fortune symbolizes karma, hard work, surrender. It’s the cogs that start moving,  the ebb and flow of the tide and the pull of the moon. It’s equal parts hustle, letting go, and constant, unwavering belief. On one hand it can look like everything you’ve ever wanted, your wildest hopes and dreams come to fruition- like destiny. But success is an illusion- your only purpose right now is to exist. To love and to see. To use the present to manifest what you want without losing whatever’s going on right now.  The Wheel of Fortune is using what you’ve been given to craft something better, something more worthwhile but it can also hide behind the curtain of ego and whisper in your ear and tell you that your life would be better if you had more or were doing something better. There’s nothing wrong with challenging yourself- but destiny and fate are elusive. They’re written in whatever language you deem them in. What’s YOUR definition of fortune, of fate? Is it coming from what your soul needs or are you crafting your lifes work in the image of what someone else (or society) tells you to?IMG_1754I also pulled Nightmare from the Oracle of Oddities. It seems backwards, but sometimes our biggest fears are actually just sheep in sheeps clothes- ever heard of too much of a good thing? Sometimes our biggest dreams are actually the scariest. Many of us have roots grown in the idea of unworthiness. We think we’re not good enough, that we’re not entitled to find bliss and happiness, that we don’t deserve whatever good things may be coming our way. That’s not true. You have the right to pursue whatever makes you shine.

Sometimes making the wheel turn and actually living in your highest calling is the hardest. Sometimes you’ll have to deal with whatever been sitting, stagnant, wasting away in the dark in the cellar. You have to do the work. And sometimes actually going for what you want is scary, sometimes it’s even scarier than the dark. What’s stopping you from getting what you want? Is it something out of your hands, or is it you? Because you have two choices- let it go and find another path or believe with all of your damn heart that you’re doing what you’re meant to do. Sometimes pushing the wheel to start it’s what’s hardest. Sometimes it’s stepping out of the way and letting the wheel move. Sometimes it’s just you- but whatever it is… you deserve to see it happen.

Southern Comfort::: The Past Four Years

I’m not sure where to start so I just will. It’s currently 9:50 pm and I’m sitting in my hotel room, without pants on, drinking the tequila my uncle got my sister and I for graduation, watching The Office. I move to California the day after tomorrow, and after saying bye to one of my closest friends my heart hurts. A lot.IMG_1122I moved around a lot as a kid, and I’ve gotten okay at saying goodbye. I know the people who are meant to be in my life will stick around. But this time, moving is different. For the first time it marks the end of a really huge chapter. It hurts. I came to Columbia, South Carolina as a fresh little 18-year-old. I was an upcoming freshman at The University of South Carolina and I didn’t know what to anticipate. What I got was a city that challenged me, thicker skin and friends who I can’t imagine life without. Columbia itself- as a city- is okay. There are some amazing spots that all the weirdos congregate to- hello Drip and NBT- and they’ve helped me when I’ve felt like my head’s going to explode. I always say Columbia isn’t a city and it’s not a town- it’s somewhere in between. The nightlife is okay, my favorite is a literal underground bar called The Whig, but what I like is the fact that it sort of just exists. You can drive 30 minutes to somewhere that feels like Mars, 2 hours to Charleston or 10 minutes to a beautiful cemetery- it has the charm of a little town and the perks of a (small) city. Columbia is it’s own kinda thing. It just does what it does and it’s kind of great.

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It takes time to recognize how a place has shaped you. I’m not sure I can even put into words the past four years but I’ll try. Columbia isn’t easy to live in if you’re not the status quo. It’s not. I’ve been getting the side eye from old Republicans for practically every day the past four years. I made a decision my freshman year to pretend that I was living in NYC and to wear whatever I want which is probably why I get all the side eyes. But here’s the thing!! Being true to who you are and shining your light means other people recognize that. In a city where weirdos are just that, you recognize the other weirdos. You gotta stick together. Going into a vintage//costume shop (Hip Wa Zee)  to apply for a job my sophomore year led to meeting one of my best friends and having one of the coolest jobs of my life. Sitting at my favorite coffee shop everyday and writing meant that I met some of my favorite people. Being the over the top, not chill human I am led me to some of the best memories of my life. College was cool but what Columbia taught me was that honoring who you are, no matter how hard it is, is worth every single side eye and judgmental look. IMG_0378

My room in Columbia was the first time that I found sanctuary. It was the first time I found my escape, the one place I could go to sit and reflect and listen to all the little things I’d been ignoring for too long. Columbia was the city where I grew up, where I had my heart broken, where I chased my dreams and explored and where I manifested my deepest desires. When my parents moved from Atlanta back to San Diego last July, Columbia became my home and safe haven. It became the city that understood what I felt and how I didn’t belong. Columbia has been MY first home- not my family’s- and I love it for that.

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It’s strange reflecting on my time here because it’s only been four years. But I’ve graduated and this marks the end of the biggest chapter of my life and that’s damn hard. I’ve never felt settled anywhere and it’s not something that I’ve always been able to deal with. This city has been comfortable but it’s stretched me and shaped me and it’s helped me accomplish some of my wildest dreams. I’ve met some of my best friends here, I’ve started my career here. I’ve found m sanctuary here. And for that- I say thank you.

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IMG_1285Pro- tip:: When you sell all your furniture, take photos with your baby succulent name Phyliss against your wall. AND never forget- bloom where you’re planted.

Here’s to the future.
XOXO,
Gabriela

5 EASY WAYS TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR HEART WHEN IT’S HURTING

First off- my heart, my thoughts, my prayers- my everything- are with the Black community and people of color. I don’t know what it’s like but I am here. I am listening. I see you and hear you and feel you and love you. I pledge to be an advocate, an ally and a help in any way, shape or form I can. To all my witchy mama’s and papa’s- you can do this spell from Story By Tarot or this ritual from The Hoodwitch if you feel helpless and don’t know what to do.

It is important to stand up when you see injustice. See a call for action and take it- talk to your politicians, call out racism and don’t be afraid to use your voice (this especially goes for white people! We are the ones who need to be carving out a space for everyone. That is not the conquest of the oppressed.)

BUT- don’t forget to take care of your own needs in the process. You must tend to your own heart before you can tend to the world. Self care in times of political and economic crisis are of the upmost importance. When you are scared of blooming, when you are too frightened to find the sun, you cannot give your light to anyone else.

 

Here are 5 easy ways to take care of your own heart when it’s hurting.

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1. Buy yourself flowers (or something beautiful)

You can spend under $5 (hello Trader Joes) and still get a beautiful bouquet. Or, you can go to your local farmers market and get yourself a bunch of weird flowers while still supporting your community, which is where I got the babes pictured above! Even if you’re not interested in the metaphysical properties of flowers, I swear- buying yourself some will make you feel better. There is something so soothing about the temporary beauty and soft spirit that comes with flowers. They look like magick, they’re effortless, they smell good and you can dry them. I always like to take self portraits when I buy flowers which leads us to…

2. Make art

Create something. Take a self portrait, write a poem. It doesn’t even matter if it sucks- just try. Enjoy the process. Get messy- finger paint , sculpt, make daisy chains. It doesn’t matter but I promise once you start to make something you’ll feel better. And, if your artwork turns into something beautiful, even better. Art is a physical manifestation of love, right?

3. Watch something funny

My pick is “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia.” There’s something so comforting about how horrible the gang is. Laughter heals- it’s medicine. Laugh until your stomach hurts, laugh until you cry, laugh until you fart, laugh until you snort- this is a no judgment zone. Just make sure you laugh.

4. Clean

I hate cleaning. Seriously. I think it’s the worst. My definition of success is  being able to afford to hire someone to cook and clean for me. When my heart is upset (hello, today) I do like to clean! When your thoughts feel disorganized and heavy and dirty- cleaning is spiritual, both physically and energetically. Physically clearing your space allows your energy to relax. It clears the muck, it allows your aura to flow. Physically seeing the results of cleaning your environment gives your subconscious permission to do the same. Having a fresh space just feels better. Added bonus points if you smudge or burn incense when you’re done. It feels so good and even if it doesn’t- at least it’s clean!

5. Tell someone how much you love them

Take the time to text or call someone and tell them how much they mean to you. Then go deeper- why. How have they helped you evolve and learn about yourself? Tell someone why you love them and then tell them again and again. Have no one you want to talk to? Write a love letter to yourself. Passing on love makes your heart stronger. If you cannot receive love, give it until it comes back. It will come back.13620373_10153550675866207_7913389384887855294_nA crow flew by and this appeared as I began to write- what a beautiful omen. There is always light.

What’s your favorite way to heal?
XXXX
Gabriela

When Anxiety Gets Ahold of You

IMG_8732When things get hard, buy yourself flowers. Make yourself some tea. Read poetry. Write bad poetry and then write poetry that’s even worse than that- you have to start somewhere so just start. Write beautiful poetry about love. Write a poem on a napkin about someone who hurt you and then tear it up and throw it out. Wear something that makes you feel like stardust. Wear nothing but your skin. Sleep in late or wake up early and spend some time under the rising or setting sun. Tell someone you’re hurting. Ask them for their help. Breathe deeply- five in and five out. Take a photo that reminds you how beautiful you are. Take a bath. Go to therapy. Park your car at the top of your parking garage, open all the windows, blast your favorite album and dance until you can’t feel your legs. Go out. Spend some time in a coffee shop with a good book. Go over to a friends house and watch a bad movie- make funny comments the whole time. Buy a journal and cover every page with your worries- go over them and paint them into something else. Let them live there.

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Feel your feelings and don’t say sorry.

Saturdazae::: Bloody Maria’s and Metallics

I’M BACK IN THE SOUTH! I spent ten days in California and it was chill! I got back on Thursday at 4am. We flew into Charlotte-  where we found my sister’s car battery dead, thanks to me leaving a light on. That’s the second car battery I’ve killed in the past month. What even…The rest of Thursday was spent in a haze. It feels like today’s the first day that I am starting to feel like I’m back to a good internal clock.IMG_8506

Anyway, I’m glad it’s finally my favorite day of the week! Saturday is my absolute, guilt free lazy day. It’s my day to not do anything I don’t want to do and I absolutely love it. I love staying up really late and sleeping in on Saturday’s, or going to Soda City, Columbia’s farmers weekly market, if I actually wake up. Yesterday was spent staying up until 6am watching Bob’s Burgers and sleeping until 1pm today. Scorpio Moon, ya’ll. But I don’t have any plans and I don’t feel guilty about it!  I got lunch and drank a Bloody Maria and I’m currently sitting on my porch with no pants so I am content. IMG_8514I watched “Addams Family Values” for the first tim all the way through “as an adult” last night and oh my god. I get it. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to be an Israeli, Mexican witch living in Columbia, South Carolina- it’s like that. Also, as someone who had to go to outdoor summer camp for over a decade and hated it- I feel for Wednesday and Pugsly. Going into 7th grade, my parents sent me to a Jewish sleepaway camp for a month. I had never been to sleepaway camp and I already considered myself a witch- I did not want to go. I cried every day for a week straight.

Camp was the worst and suburban normies are (usually) the worst too! There’s nothing fun or important about failing to use your voice and be your own person, and judging people for this, and for not falling into your realm of comfort, is lame. Anyway, I loved the movie and am once again, reminded how Morticia Addams is probably the best fictional character ever and that she is severely underrated. Goals, am I right. IMG_8518 IMG_8519 Bodysuit:: American Apparel// Shoes:: Vagabond// Bag: Zara// Bolo, skirt, jacket:: VintageIMG_8520I hope you all have Saturday’s spent with people you love, dancing or relaxing!
XOXO,
Gabriela

The Ultimate 2015 Resolution

I am completely and utterly ready for a new year. I am ready for a fresh start and a new chapter. I am ready for 2015 and for everything it holds, the good, the bad, the ugly. As the year draws closer and closer to a close, I continue to be inspired to really and truly dig deep and make some changes. As much as I love fall, winter always tests me emotionally, forcing me to examine deeper parts of myself that tend to go unnoticed in the warmer months. Today is the winter solstice and the new moon. After today, the days start to get longer and longer, and the nights shorter. Paired with the new moon, the solstice is the perfect time to celebrate and reflect on the past year and really focus on what we want to cultivate and grow in this next year. With the solstice and new moon urging me on, I’m making an effort to start my resolutions early, to try to start the new year of on the best foot I can.

4This year I’m making one resolution… to LOVE MORE.  That’s an all inclusive love that rings true in everything I do. I have a knack at getting agitated and angry at those I care about the most, my family, and it’s something I desperately need to change. I’m a creature of habit, but I’m also well aware that there are habits I need to break. Patterns are great if they serve you, not so much if they don’t. So, I want to dig deep, aim true and love this new year. Here are the three ways I plan to LOVE MORE in 2015.

1Love MYSELF

I’m all about self-love. I’m all about knowing you’re own worth and basking in it. I think having love for yourself means having love for other people. I think that self-love is the basis for all other love, so it’s the first thing on my list of resolutions. For 2015 I want to be more compassionate towards myselff and I want to be less judgmental as well. Self-love, for me, couples with witchcraft, yoga, tarot and magick. For me, my journey of loving myself means taking time to do the things that give me purpose and feed my soul. In 2015 I want to make an effort to connect, be present and really LOVE myself and my own spirit, path and soul.

This morning, I drew two cards for a simple reading, one for the solstice and one for the new moon. I drew the Six of Cups and The Wheel of Fortune, respectively. The Six of Cups speaks of finding your roots in memories and in your home. Finding comfort in what grounds you emotionally. The Wheel of  Fortune speaks of change, destiny and movement. For me, these cards together remind me to stay grounded in my roots, my family and friends, as things start to change and shift. This new year, I am reminded to take comfort in that which grounds me, even if things around me begin to move. 

2Love OTHERS

I’m putting it in my own cards, 2015 is going to be a year of growth. 2015 is the year I remember that anger is never the way to deal with situations that deviate from my own expectations. My biggest resolution in 2015 is to see the love in everyone, and to change old habits and patterns that don’t serve me. I want to be even more positive and happy than I am now, I want to remember that everyone is worthy of love. This new year, I’m loving those around me to the fullest extent that I can. I am making the effort to think before I speak, to react out of kindness and love and not frustration and anger, and to judge less. This new year, I am saying “I LOVE YOU” and meaning it, even more than I do now. 2015 will be a year of compassion, love, happiness and taking my reality into my own hands. 2015 is the year that I am the best person I can be.

yooooooooLove THE UNIVERSE.

Ahhh, the universe. The universe always knows what it’s doing, even if I don’t want to accept it. I’ve always said the universe has perfect timing, and even though it doesn’t always seem like it in the moment, nine times out of ten, in the long run things have a way of falling into place as they should. I find myself in a spiritual and emotional rut when my gratuity falters, when I have anxiety over things that haven’t happened and when I hold onto things I need to let go of. Loving the universe, for me, means knowing that I can’t change some things but that I can control how I view them. Loving the universe means saying THANK YOU when things are tough, and hard or even wonderful and beautiful.Loving the universe means knowing to surrender to the things that make me whole. Loving the universe means knowing I’m caught in something larger than myself, knowing that I have to surrender and live from my heart. I love this universe, and every single mystery it holds. 2015 will be the year that I live and love in THAT.

I want to love the most I can in every single way I can this year.

What are your resolutions?

Namaste,

Gabriela